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Does My Head Look Big In This?

Does My Head Look Big In This?

by Randa Abdel-Fattah 2007 360 pages
3.65
12.2K ratings
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Plot Summary

Hijab Epiphany and Family Bonds

Amal's hijab decision transforms her life

Amal Abdel-Hakim, a sixteen-year-old Australian-Palestinian-Muslim, is struck by a sudden conviction to wear the hijab full-time after a moment of inspiration while watching TV. Her family—loving, quirky, and supportive—reacts with a mix of pride and concern, knowing the challenges she'll face at her new, predominantly Anglo private school. Amal's parents, both professionals, are deeply connected to their heritage but have adapted to Australian life. Their warmth and humor provide Amal with a strong foundation, even as she worries about standing out and being misunderstood. The chapter sets the tone for Amal's journey: a blend of humor, anxiety, and the search for belonging, as she prepares to step into a new identity and face the world's reactions.

Lists, Fears, and Identity

Amal weighs faith against social fears

Amal's mind races with doubts and anxieties about her decision. She makes lists of who will support or judge her, reflecting on her experiences as a minority in both Catholic and Islamic schools. Her memories of being the odd one out—mispronounced names, cultural misunderstandings, and playground taunts—fuel her apprehension. Yet, she also recalls the comfort of her old Islamic school, where her faith was normalized. The hijab becomes a symbol of both vulnerability and empowerment, a way to claim her identity on her own terms. Amal's internal debate is laced with humor and self-deprecation, but beneath it lies a deep longing for acceptance and the courage to be true to herself.

Friends, Fashion, and Decision

Support and style shape Amal's resolve

Amal turns to her closest friends, Leila and Yasmeen, for advice and solidarity. Leila, already a full-time hijabi, offers encouragement and practical tips, while Yasmeen, more skeptical, jokes about the social risks. Together, they plan shopping trips and fashion experiments, blending modesty with teenage style. Amal's parents, initially cautious, agree to let her try wearing the hijab in public, leading to a nerve-wracking but ultimately empowering outing at the local mall. The experience reveals both the stares and the unexpected camaraderie among hijabi women. Amal feels a new sense of freedom and connection, realizing that her choice is about more than appearance—it's about self-definition and spiritual fulfillment.

First Day, First Stares

Amal faces school with hijab on

The first day back at McCleans Grammar is a test of Amal's resolve. She meticulously prepares her hijab to match her uniform, battling nerves and her parents' last-minute worries. At school, she's met with silence, stares, and awkwardness from classmates and teachers. The principal, Ms. Walsh, is taken aback and questions Amal's motives, suspecting parental coercion. Amal stands her ground, insisting the decision is hers alone. Her friends Simone and Eileen offer immediate support, while others keep their distance. Amal's crush, Adam, avoids her, deepening her anxiety. Yet, small acts of kindness—a teacher's acceptance, friends' encouragement—help her survive the day, marking the beginning of her public journey as a hijabi.

School Reactions and Support

Friendships deepen amid school scrutiny

As the novelty of Amal's hijab wears off, curiosity replaces silence. Classmates bombard her with questions—some genuine, some ignorant—about her faith, family, and personal choices. Amal uses humor and honesty to deflect stereotypes, educating her peers while maintaining her dignity. Adam's awkwardness gives way to interest, and the group's dynamics shift as Josh, a Jewish classmate, and others become more involved. Amal navigates microaggressions and outright rudeness from Tia and her clique, but finds strength in her friendships. The chapter explores the complexities of teenage relationships, the pain of exclusion, and the power of solidarity in the face of prejudice.

Principal's Challenge and Parental Meeting

Authority and autonomy clash over hijab

Ms. Walsh, the principal, calls Amal's parents for a meeting, hoping to persuade them to dissuade Amal from wearing the hijab. Instead, Amal's parents clarify that the choice is entirely Amal's, and Ms. Walsh reluctantly agrees to allow the hijab, provided it matches the school uniform. Amal becomes an "agenda item" at staff meetings, feeling both singled out and supported. The episode highlights the tension between institutional conformity and individual rights, as well as the subtle ways authority figures can undermine or empower students. Amal's victory is bittersweet, as she realizes the scrutiny she'll continue to face, but she's buoyed by her parents' and friends' unwavering support.

Questions, Crushes, and Choices

Curiosity, romance, and boundaries intertwine

With the hijab now a fixture, Amal's classmates grow bolder in their questions, ranging from the practical to the absurd. Adam, her crush, begins to engage with her more openly, leading to a deepening friendship laced with mutual attraction. The group discusses dating, religion, and cultural expectations, revealing their own insecurities and desires. Amal is clear about her boundaries—no dating or physical intimacy before marriage, as per her faith—but she's honest about her feelings and temptations. The chapter explores the universal teenage struggle to balance desire, identity, and values, set against the backdrop of cultural and religious diversity.

Body Image and Friendship

Insecurities and loyalty test friendships

Simone's struggles with body image and her mother's relentless pressure to lose weight come to the fore. The group rallies around her, challenging toxic beauty standards and supporting her through cycles of dieting and self-doubt. Amal's own insecurities—about her appearance, her hijab, and her place in the social hierarchy—mirror Simone's, creating a bond of empathy and mutual encouragement. The friends navigate the minefield of adolescence together, using humor, honesty, and occasional rebellion to assert their worth. The chapter underscores the importance of friendship as a refuge from external judgment and internalized shame.

Debates, Dreams, and Doubts

Ambition and anxiety shape the future

Amal is encouraged to join the school's debating team, but hesitates, fearing public scrutiny and the added pressure of representing her faith. Adam pushes her to participate, recognizing her intelligence and passion. The group discusses their dreams for the future—university, careers, independence—while grappling with family expectations and societal barriers. Amal's doubts about her ability to succeed as a visibly Muslim woman in Australia are compounded by experiences of discrimination, but she's inspired by her friends' resilience and her own past acts of courage. The chapter explores the interplay between ambition, anxiety, and the search for purpose.

Family, Culture, and Assimilation

Generational clashes and cultural identity collide

Family gatherings reveal the complexities of cultural assimilation and generational conflict. Amal's relatives range from the devout to the secular, each negotiating their heritage in different ways. Her cousin Samantha hides her relationship from her parents, while Uncle Joe and Aunt Mandy embrace "Aussie" culture to the point of caricature. Leila's family, meanwhile, is torn between traditional expectations and modern aspirations, with Leila's mother pressuring her to marry young. Amal observes these dynamics with a mix of frustration and empathy, recognizing the pain and humor in the struggle to belong. The chapter highlights the fluidity of identity and the challenges of honoring one's roots while forging a unique path.

Prejudice, Prayer, and Perseverance

Discrimination and faith test Amal's resolve

Amal faces overt discrimination—from a bus driver blasting anti-Muslim talk radio to a shop owner refusing her a job because of her hijab. These incidents shake her confidence, but also deepen her commitment to her faith and her community. Prayer becomes a source of solace and strength, a "slurpie break" in the chaos of daily life. Amal's relationships with her non-Muslim friends, especially Simone and Eileen, are tested and strengthened as they witness and support her through these challenges. The chapter explores the emotional toll of prejudice and the resilience required to persevere.

Simone and Josh: New Beginnings

Romance blooms amid self-acceptance

Simone and Josh's friendship blossoms into romance, providing a subplot of hope and joy. Simone's self-esteem grows as Josh's affection helps her see herself through kinder eyes. The group navigates the excitement and awkwardness of first love, with Amal and Eileen offering advice and support. Simone's decision to quit smoking, inspired by Josh's encouragement, marks a turning point in her journey toward self-acceptance. The chapter celebrates the transformative power of friendship and love, even as it acknowledges the ongoing struggles with body image and societal expectations.

Leila's Struggle for Freedom

Tradition and autonomy clash in Leila's life

Leila's home life reaches a breaking point as her mother arranges a marriage without her consent. Feeling trapped and unsupported, Leila runs away, seeking refuge in a women's shelter. Amal and Yasmeen are wracked with guilt and fear for their friend's safety, while Leila's family is thrown into turmoil. The episode exposes the darker side of cultural tradition, the pain of parental misunderstanding, and the courage required to claim one's autonomy. Leila's eventual return, brokered by a trusted teacher, is a testament to the power of faith, friendship, and the possibility of change, even within rigid systems.

Detention, Discrimination, and Determination

Setbacks fuel Amal's determination to succeed

Amal and her friends are caught skipping school, leading to detention and a candid conversation with Mr. Pearse, a supportive teacher who shares his own experiences with prejudice. Amal's attempt to find a part-time job is thwarted by discrimination, leaving her disheartened but not defeated. Her mother's encouragement and her own sense of purpose help her refocus on her goals. The chapter explores the cumulative impact of small injustices and the importance of allies—both peers and adults—in sustaining hope and determination.

Ramadan, Reconciliation, and Return

Faith, forgiveness, and friendship restore balance

Ramadan brings a period of reflection, discipline, and community. Amal finds comfort in the rituals of fasting and prayer, and in the support of her family and friends. Mrs. Vaselli, her grumpy Greek neighbor, becomes an unlikely confidante, sharing her own stories of migration, loss, and reconciliation. Leila's return home is marked by tentative steps toward understanding and compromise with her mother. The chapter weaves together themes of forgiveness, resilience, and the healing power of faith and friendship.

Debate Triumph and Self-Discovery

Public victory affirms Amal's inner growth

The school debate becomes a crucible for Amal's self-confidence and public identity. Facing a formidable opponent, she draws on her faith, intellect, and the support of her community to deliver a powerful performance. The victory is not just personal—it's a statement of belonging and capability in a society that often doubts her. Amal's relationships with Adam and her friends evolve, marked by honesty, boundaries, and mutual respect. The chapter culminates in a sense of accomplishment and the realization that self-discovery is an ongoing journey.

Eid, Endings, and New Lists

Celebration, closure, and hope for the future

Eid al-Fitr marks the end of Ramadan and a time of celebration, gratitude, and renewal. Amal reflects on the year's challenges and triumphs, the growth of her friendships, and the evolving dynamics within her family and community. Leila's relationship with her mother improves, Simone and Josh's romance flourishes, and Amal finds peace in her choices. The story closes with Amal embracing her identity—not as a fixed label, but as an ongoing process of becoming. She abandons her old lists, confident that she knows who she is and who she wants to be.

Characters

Amal Abdel-Hakim

Courageous, witty, and searching for belonging

Amal is the heart of the story—a sixteen-year-old Australian-Muslim navigating the complexities of faith, identity, and adolescence. Her decision to wear the hijab full-time is both a spiritual commitment and a social risk, exposing her to scrutiny, prejudice, and self-doubt. Amal is introspective, articulate, and often self-deprecating, using humor to deflect pain and connect with others. Her relationships—with her family, friends, and crush Adam—reveal her vulnerability and resilience. Over the course of the novel, Amal grows from a girl anxious about standing out to a young woman confident in her choices, capable of empathy, and committed to forging her own path.

Leila Okulgen

Resilient, ambitious, and caught between worlds

Leila is Amal's closest friend and a fellow hijabi, but her home life is fraught with tension. Her mother's insistence on early marriage and traditional roles clashes with Leila's academic ambitions and desire for independence. Leila is intelligent, determined, and fiercely loyal, but the pressure at home leads her to a breaking point. Her temporary escape and eventual return highlight the pain of cultural conflict and the possibility of reconciliation. Leila's journey is one of self-assertion, faith, and the ongoing struggle to balance family expectations with personal dreams.

Simone

Insecure, loyal, and learning self-love

Simone is Amal's non-Muslim friend, whose struggles with body image and her mother's criticism mirror Amal's own insecurities. Simone is funny, caring, and often self-deprecating, using humor to mask her pain. Her romance with Josh becomes a catalyst for self-acceptance, as she learns to see herself through kinder eyes. Simone's journey is one of overcoming internalized shame, embracing her worth, and finding joy in friendship and love. Her loyalty to Amal and the group is unwavering, providing a safe space for honesty and growth.

Yasmeen Khan

Confident, stylish, and bridging cultures

Yasmeen, with her mixed Pakistani-British heritage, is the group's fashionista and comic relief. She navigates her own cultural expectations with wit and pragmatism, often challenging Amal and Leila to balance faith with fun. Yasmeen's family is more liberal, and her mother, Aunt Cassandra, provides a model of cross-cultural adaptation. Yasmeen's role is to push boundaries, offer perspective, and remind her friends not to take themselves too seriously. Her presence highlights the diversity within the Muslim community and the importance of self-expression.

Adam Keane

Ambitious, conflicted, and seeking connection

Adam is Amal's classmate, lab partner, and eventual close friend (and crush). He is intelligent, athletic, and popular, but his family life is complicated—his mother left when he was young, and he is raised by his father and his father's partner. Adam is drawn to Amal's strength and authenticity, but their relationship is fraught with misunderstandings about boundaries, faith, and intimacy. Adam's journey is one of learning respect, confronting his own assumptions, and accepting the limits of connection across cultural divides. His dynamic with Amal is both tender and tense, reflecting the challenges of cross-cultural friendship and attraction.

Eileen Tanaka

Grounded, creative, and quietly strong

Eileen, of Japanese descent, is the group's voice of reason and stability. She faces her own family pressures to pursue a "respectable" career, but dreams of creative pursuits. Eileen is empathetic, observant, and supportive, often mediating conflicts and offering practical advice. Her friendship with Amal and Simone is marked by honesty and mutual respect. Eileen's journey is about asserting her individuality, balancing family expectations, and finding her own path.

Tia Tamos

Antagonistic, insecure, and status-obsessed

Tia is the school's queen bee and Amal's chief antagonist. She embodies the pressures of conformity, beauty standards, and social hierarchy. Tia's cruelty is often a mask for her own insecurities and desire for control. Her interactions with Amal and Simone expose the toxic dynamics of high school cliques and the pain of exclusion. Tia's character serves as a foil to Amal, highlighting the costs of superficiality and the strength required to resist peer pressure.

Mrs. Vaselli

Lonely, gruff, and ultimately compassionate

Mrs. Vaselli, Amal's Greek Orthodox neighbor, begins as a source of irritation and prejudice but becomes an unexpected confidante. Her own story of migration, loss, and estrangement from her son mirrors Amal's struggles with belonging and acceptance. Through shared conversations and acts of kindness, Mrs. Vaselli and Amal bridge their differences, finding common ground in their experiences as outsiders. Mrs. Vaselli's arc is one of reconciliation, forgiveness, and the enduring need for connection.

Ms. Walsh

Rigid, well-meaning, and challenged by change

Ms. Walsh, the school principal, represents institutional authority and the challenges of accommodating diversity. Initially resistant to Amal's hijab, she is forced to confront her own biases and the limitations of school policy. Her interactions with Amal and her parents reveal the complexities of leadership in a multicultural society. Ms. Walsh's journey is one of gradual understanding, compromise, and the recognition that true inclusion requires more than tolerance—it demands empathy and flexibility.

Mr. Pearse

Supportive, insightful, and quietly revolutionary

Mr. Pearse, Amal's English teacher, is a key adult ally. He recognizes Amal's potential, encourages her to join the debating team, and offers guidance without condescension. His own experiences with prejudice (his partner is Koorie) inform his empathy and advocacy. Mr. Pearse's presence is a reminder that teachers can be transformative figures, providing the support and validation that young people need to thrive.

Plot Devices

First-Person Narrative and Humor

Amal's voice shapes the reader's experience

The novel is told in Amal's witty, candid first-person voice, blending humor with vulnerability. This narrative style invites readers into her inner world, making her struggles and triumphs deeply relatable. Humor is used as both a shield and a bridge, defusing tension and fostering connection. The voice is conversational, confessional, and often self-mocking, allowing for nuanced exploration of serious themes without didacticism.

Lists, Internal Monologue, and Repetition

Lists externalize Amal's anxieties and decisions

Amal's habit of making lists—of supporters, fears, pros and cons—serves as a structural device to externalize her internal conflicts. These lists, along with her running internal monologue, provide insight into her thought processes and emotional state. The repetition of certain motifs (e.g., "To Wear or Not To Wear," "To Be or Not To Be") underscores the ongoing nature of identity formation and decision-making.

Parallel Storylines and Interwoven Subplots

Multiple arcs reflect the diversity of experience

The novel weaves together the stories of Amal's friends, family, and community, creating a tapestry of intersecting challenges and aspirations. Subplots—Simone's romance, Leila's family conflict, Mrs. Vaselli's estrangement—mirror and contrast Amal's journey, highlighting the universality of the search for acceptance and autonomy. These parallel arcs enrich the narrative, offering multiple perspectives on faith, culture, and adolescence.

Dialogue and Cultural Code-Switching

Authentic speech reveals character and context

Dialogue is a key device, capturing the rhythms of teenage speech, cultural code-switching, and intergenerational misunderstandings. The use of Arabic, Turkish, and other languages, as well as references to pop culture and religious practices, grounds the story in its multicultural setting. Dialogue is used to both reveal and challenge assumptions, fostering empathy and understanding.

Foreshadowing and Symbolism

Hijab and other symbols carry layered meanings

The hijab is both a literal garment and a symbol of faith, identity, and resistance. Its presence foreshadows the challenges Amal will face and the growth she will undergo. Other symbols—lists, debates, food, and festivals—carry layered meanings, representing the negotiation of boundaries, the assertion of self, and the celebration of community. Foreshadowing is used subtly, hinting at future conflicts and resolutions.

Analysis

A vibrant exploration of identity, faith, and belonging in multicultural Australia

Does My Head Look Big In This? is a coming-of-age novel that deftly balances humor, heartache, and hope. Through Amal's journey, Randa Abdel-Fattah interrogates the complexities of growing up Muslim in a Western society, challenging stereotypes and inviting readers to question their own assumptions. The novel's strength lies in its refusal to offer easy answers—identity is shown as fluid, contested, and deeply personal. The story foregrounds the importance of agency, the right to self-definition, and the necessity of empathy across cultural divides. It also addresses universal adolescent concerns—friendship, body image, family conflict—making it accessible to a broad audience. The book's modern relevance is heightened by its engagement with issues of Islamophobia, gender, and the politics of representation. Ultimately, the novel is a celebration of resilience, the power of community, and the courage it takes to be oneself in a world that often demands conformity. Its lesson is clear: true belonging comes not from erasing difference, but from embracing it with pride and compassion.

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Review Summary

3.65 out of 5
Average of 12.2K ratings from Goodreads and Amazon.

Does My Head Look Big In This? follows Amal, a 16-year-old Australian-Palestinian Muslim who decides to wear the hijab full-time. Reviews are mixed: some praise the representation and humor, while others criticize the writing as preachy, melodramatic, and unrealistic. Muslim readers particularly noted concerns about exaggerated discrimination, stereotypical characters, and shallow treatment of Islamic concepts. Many felt the book oversimplifies Muslim experiences, with scenarios ranging from overly liberal to extremely conservative families. However, others appreciated its groundbreaking representation of a "normal" Muslim teenager and its accessibility for non-Muslim readers seeking understanding post-9/11. The book effectively highlights everyday teenage concerns alongside religious identity.

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About the Author

Randa Abdel-Fattah was born in Sydney in 1979 to Palestinian and Egyptian parents. She grew up in Melbourne, attending Catholic primary school and Islamic secondary college before studying Arts/Law at Melbourne University. As Media Liaison Officer at the Islamic Council of Victoria, she wrote extensively about Muslim representation in media. A passionate human rights advocate, she worked with numerous organizations including the Asylum Seeker Resource Centre and Palestine Human Rights Campaign. Her articles have appeared in major Australian publications and international outlets like Le Monde. She frequently comments on Palestine, Islam, and Australian Muslims in media and speaks at schools about social justice issues. She works as a litigation lawyer in Sydney.

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