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Style

Style

Toward Clarity and Grace
by Joseph M. Williams 1995 226 pages
4.21
2.0K ratings
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Key Takeaways

1. Clarity: Align Characters and Actions for Directness

Readers are likely to feel that they are reading prose that is clear and direct when (1) the subjects of the sentences name the cast of characters, and (2) the verbs that go with those subjects name the crucial actions those characters are part of.

Feelings vs. analysis. When prose feels "turgid" or "awkward," it's a subjective response. To move beyond mere impression, we need a precise vocabulary to diagnose why we feel that way. The core problem often lies in a fundamental mismatch between the grammatical structure of a sentence and the underlying "story" it attempts to tell.

The subject-verb core. Clear writing consistently aligns the grammatical subject of a sentence with the "character" performing an action, and the verb with that "action." This simple alignment transforms abstract, expository prose into something that feels more like a narrative, making it inherently easier for readers to process. For example, instead of "Our lack of knowledge precluded determination," write "We could not determine."

Nominalizations and passives. Abstract nouns, or "nominalizations" (verbs or adjectives turned into nouns like "determination" from "determine"), are primary culprits in obscuring actions and characters, leading to "gummy" prose. While not inherently evil, unnecessary passive verbs also hide the agents of actions. Revising these elements makes writing more specific, concrete, and often eliminates excessive prepositional phrases, enhancing overall clarity.

2. Cohesion: Manage Information Flow from Old to New

Put at the beginning of a sentence those ideas that you have already mentioned, referred to, or implied, or concepts that you can reasonably assume your reader is already familiar with, and will readily recognize.

Beyond single sentences. A series of individually clear sentences can still be confusing if they lack a coherent flow. Cohesion is about seamlessly linking sentences into a unified discourse, guiding the reader smoothly from what they already know to what is new and important. This continuous flow prevents readers from feeling disoriented or disjointed.

Topic and stress. The "topic" of a sentence, typically its grammatical subject, introduces familiar information, setting a stable context for the reader. Conversely, the "stress" position, usually at the end of the sentence, is reserved for the newest, most surprising, or most significant information. This old-to-new information flow is a fundamental principle of how readers process and integrate new knowledge.

Consistent topics. A consistent "topic string"—a sequence of related ideas at the beginning of consecutive sentences—provides a stable point of view and anchors the reader's attention. This consistency helps readers build a coherent mental model of the text. Avoid excessive metadiscourse or random topic shifts, which can disorient the reader. Even using "you" as a consistent topic can make complex material more accessible and engaging for a specific audience.

3. Coherence: Paragraphs Need Clear "POINTS" and Thematic Strings

A reader will feel that a paragraph is coherent if she can read a sentence that specifically articulates its POINT.

The "POINT" sentence. Beyond mere cohesion, paragraphs and larger sections require a clear argumentative or expository center—a "POINT." This is the single sentence that encapsulates the main claim, observation, or idea of that unit of discourse, serving as its logical and rhetorical core. Without it, readers may miss the central message.

Issue and discussion. Every organized unit of discourse, from a paragraph to a full document, comprises an "issue" (a short introductory segment) and a "discussion" (the elaboration and support). The POINT sentence is predictably located either at the end of the issue (a "POINT-early" structure, common in professional writing) or at the end of the discussion (a "POINT-last" structure, used for discovery, politeness, or in belletristic essays).

Thematic strings and headings. Coherence is further built through "thematic strings"—networks of conceptually related words woven throughout the text, reinforcing core ideas. These, alongside consistent topic strings, form the conceptual architecture of a passage. Headings serve as crucial diagnostic tools for writers: if you struggle to identify where to place or what to name your headings, it's a strong indicator that your document's underlying structure is unclear to your readers.

4. Concision: Eliminate Redundancy and Obviousness

Usually, compress what you mean into the fewest words. Don't state what your reader can easily infer.

The essence of concision. Concise writing is about expressing ideas efficiently, delivering maximum meaning with minimum linguistic clutter. It respects the reader's time and attention by eliminating words or phrases that add no new information or can be easily inferred. This principle is fundamental to a direct and impactful style.

Common sources of wordiness. Many common writing habits inadvertently inflate prose:

  • Redundant pairs: "each and every," "true and accurate."
  • Redundant modifiers: "completely finish," "past memories."
  • Redundant categories: "pink in color," "round in shape."
  • Meaningless modifiers: "really," "basically," "for all intents and purposes."
  • Pompous diction: "utilization" for "use," "endeavor" for "try."
    These can often be pruned with little to no loss of meaning.

Beyond simple pruning. Concision also involves avoiding "belaboring the obvious," which can be a sign of a novice writer learning a new field and needing to articulate foundational knowledge. Replacing multi-word phrases with single, precise words (e.g., "the reason for" to "why") and judiciously controlling metadiscourse are advanced techniques that sharpen prose and enhance its directness.

5. Graceful Length: Master Sentence Extension and Flow

A well-managed long sentence can be just as clear and crisp as several short ones.

Length vs. sprawl. Long sentences are not inherently problematic; it is shapeless, sprawling sentences that confuse readers. A graceful long sentence maintains clarity and vigor, allowing a writer to develop complex ideas or intricate relationships without sacrificing readability or forcing the reader to backtrack.

Techniques for extension. Several rhetorical devices enable elegant sentence extension:

  • Coordination: Joining grammatically equal segments, ideally after the subject, often with shorter elements preceding longer ones for rhythmic effect.
  • Resumptive modifiers: Repeating a key word near the end of a clause and then elaborating on it with a relative clause, creating a natural pause and continuation.
  • Summative modifiers: Ending a segment with a comma, summing up the preceding idea in a noun phrase, and then continuing with a relative clause, avoiding vague pronoun references.

Maintaining flow. Crucially, avoid interrupting major grammatical links like subject-verb or verb-object with long phrases or clauses, as this forces readers to hold their breath. Place modifiers strategically to prevent ambiguity or hesitation. While masters like Geertz or Derrida can use "artful interruptions" to suggest a mind at work, for most writers, such techniques can easily become distracting mannerisms if not executed with precision and clear purpose.

6. Elegance: Cultivate Balance, Rhythm, and Metaphor

By far the greatest thing is to be a master of metaphor. It is the one thing that cannot be learned from others. It is a sign of genius, for a good metaphor implies an intuitive perception of similarity among dissimilars.

Beyond clarity. While clarity and concision are foundational, elegance elevates prose from merely functional to truly memorable. It adds zest, distinction, and a certain "class," fixing ideas in the reader's mind through artful expression that transcends plainness.

Balance and rhythm. Conscious use of balance and symmetry, particularly in coordinated structures, creates a rhythmic and satisfying flow. This can involve counterpointing grammar and meaning (e.g., "vacuous emotion" against "mindless eroticism") or balancing phrases and clauses against each other. Deliberately varying sentence length also contributes to rhythm, whether to convey urgency with short bursts or to explore complex ideas with expansive, flowing sentences.

The power of metaphor. Metaphor vivifies prose, offering fresh ways to perceive and understand. It can emphasize, illuminate, or explain complex ideas, even in technical or scholarly writing, by drawing intuitive connections between dissimilar things. However, metaphors must be used with precision to avoid inexact thinking, extravagance, or unintended literal meanings that can undermine clarity and credibility. A careless metaphor can confuse more than it clarifies.

7. Usage: Distinguish Real Rules from Folklore and Choice

No grammatical rules have sufficient authority to control the firm and established usage of language. Established custom, in speaking and writing, is the standard to which we must at last resort for determining every controverted point in language and style.

The complexity of "correctness." "Good grammar" is not a simple matter of absolute right or wrong; it's a nuanced landscape influenced by social, historical, and even idiosyncratic factors. Many "rules" are classroom folklore, invented by 18th-century grammarians, and often ignored by the most reputable writers. Blind adherence can stifle stylistic flexibility.

Three kinds of rules.

  • Real Rules: These govern the fundamental structure of English (e.g., subject-verb order). Violating them marks nonstandard English (e.g., double negatives, nonstandard verb forms like "knowed").
  • Folklore Rules: Widely taught but frequently ignored by educated writers (e.g., never start a sentence with "and" or "but," the "that" vs. "which" distinction for restrictive clauses). These often lack historical or logical basis.
  • Optional Rules: Observed by some educated writers for a heightened sense of formality, but not strictly enforced (e.g., split infinitives, "whom" as an object, avoiding ending sentences with prepositions).

Navigating usage. A discerning writer understands the historical context and social implications of usage. Instead of rigid dogma, choices should be based on audience, purpose, and the observable habits of reputable writers. This includes navigating "bêtes noires" (highly criticized but often illogical rules like "hopefully" or "finalize") and addressing issues like sexist language with sensitivity and common sense, prioritizing effective communication over arbitrary proscriptions.

8. The Social Dimension of Style: Audience and Purpose Dictate Choices

The problem is to recognize those occasions when we should subordinate one principle to another. That's not something I can help you with. That knowledge comes only with experience.

Style as choice. Every stylistic decision, from word choice to sentence structure, is a choice. There is no single "correct" style, but rather a spectrum of effective styles tailored to specific contexts. The ultimate goal is not merely to follow rules, but to make conscious, informed choices that best serve your communicative purpose and resonate with your intended audience.

Audience awareness. Effective writing is deeply audience-centric. What constitutes "clear" or "concise" depends heavily on what your readers already know, their expectations, and their level of expertise. A technical report for experts will differ significantly from a public announcement, even if conveying similar information. Underestimating a reader's knowledge often leads to vagueness, while overestimating it can lead to unnecessary detail.

Purpose and voice. Your purpose in writing—whether to inform, persuade, amuse, or warn—should guide your stylistic choices. This also shapes the "voice" you project. While some advocate for an "authentic" voice, a skilled writer can consciously adopt different voices (e.g., authoritative, laconic, formal) to suit the occasion, just as one chooses how to dress or behave in different social settings.

Experience and judgment. While principles can guide, true mastery of style comes from experience. It's about developing an instinct for when to adhere to a principle and when to artfully deviate, when to prioritize clarity over concision, or formality over directness. This nuanced judgment allows a writer to not only meet reader expectations but also to surprise and engage them effectively.

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